I am NOT Howard Dean!

Okay, let me make this perfectly clear: I am not Howard Dean.

For whatever reason, people see the by-line below and naturally assume it's Howard Dean that's running the Jay Leno for President campaign. But it's not. Though people often get the two of us confused because we share the same first name, Mr. Dean and I couldn't be more different. In the first place, he's much taller than I. Then there's the fact that my last name is "Lester" , not "Dean". If that's not enough, I'd be forced to point out the fact that only one of us foolishly blew the 2004 campaign by yelping like a wounded dog on camera....and it wasn't me.

I could point to other important differences, but what's the use? Dean would only deny them. Frankly, he's been riding the coat-tails of my name for years and, now that I'm finally doing something meaningful for the nation, there he is wanting to cash in on it.

I know Jay will understand. He's done enough jokes about Mr. Dean over the years to have a unique insight into Howard's predilection for spontaneous outbursts at the worst-possible times. In that same spirit, even though I am not, repeat not, Howard Dean, I have taken a page from his 2004 campaign play book. I crumpled it up and threw it away.