Jay's "Lenonomics" Platform

In response to his Democratic and Republican challengers, the Jay Leno for President campaign has begun drafting Jay's economics platform from which his positions on the economy will be launched. Labeled "Lenonomics", the platform will compete head-to-head with Obamanomics, Clintonomics, Bidenomics, Thompsonomics, McCainomics, and other "-onomics" flipantly tacked onto candidate names.

"Fortunately for Jay, his name last name ends in an 'o' and allows 'nomics' to be added effortlessly," said campaign chaiman, Howard Lester. "I can't imagine how you'd add it to Giuliani, Huckabee, or Kucinich."

The apparent similarity between "Lenonomics" and "Leninomics" or "Lennonomics" was carefully considered by economic advisors to the Jay Leno for President campaign. "We certainly don't want voters to think Jay is basing his economic platform on the ideals of Vladimir Lenin or John Lennon. But since most Americans are not burdened by knowledge Lenin's or Lennon's writings, people will just think Lenonomics is brand new."

Though the planks of the Lenonomics platform are still under development, campaign officials promise Jay Leno will have a clear-cut position on the economy and all of the important presidential campaign issues if and when he finds out he's a candidate. Until then, he'll continue to joke about it as usual on the Tonight Show.

The Jay Leno for President campaign offered supporters a quick glimpse of the formula on which the Lenonomics platform will be based. Suggestions from other economics experts are being warmly received.